days of gratitude {6}: my job.

{source}

i was sixteen years old when i knew that i wanted to be a counselor.

i was sure of two things: one... that i loved to listen to people and two... that it would mean a whole lot of school.  and debt.  but i was okay with that, because it just felt like it was my calling.

i went off to college and plowed ahead to graduate school.  through lots of teary calls home, studying groups at the ihop down the street and several nights of putting on a pot of coffee at ten pm in order to make it through a research paper, i made it through by my last strand of sanity.  god opened the doors for me to work for a few years in a counseling ministry at an awesome church outside of dallas, and then lead me to pursue texas licensure.  it was then that i found myself working for a healthcare clinic doing psychological evaluations, as well as a private practice working as a clinician and in the front office as well.  i thoroughly enjoyed what i was doing, and loved the different people i got to meet with every day.  i was pregnant at the time, meeting back to back with several clients, and instead of being exhausted, i found myself energized and genuinely loving what i did.  that's when you know you've got a good thing going.  i specifically remember really enjoying working with kiddos.  being a young counselor, i found my niche connecting with little ones and adolescents and i really, really loved it.  their bright eyes even in moments of brokenness, unpretentious spirits, imagination, resiliency and playfulness was inspirational to me.  i remember being nine months pregnant and getting down on the floor, big belly and all, with some of my young ones to draw and play puzzles (thankfully, i was able to get up at the end of every session).  i just loved it.

when i had bella, i took a few months off and planned on going back to my work three days a week.  it was then we received the news no new parents want to hear: the daycare we had all lined up for bella was closing it's doors... we were at square one again.  i decided to take a year off, worked as a nanny for two sweet families so i could tote bella right along with me, and we also prepared our family for another huge change: moving halfway across the country to my home state of maine.  we didn't have jobs lined up, and weren't really sure what would fall into place but we knew god was calling us and many, many circumstances made that clear.  so we trusted him and made the move.  no surprise that his timing was hugely perfect and he provided in ways we could've never imagined.  nick, a full time teaching job in subjects he hadn't even been teaching... and me, an elementary school counselor: which has proven to be my most beloved job.

i found the advertisement as i was doing my daily browsing on a website for teaching jobs for nick.  it was perfect: three days a week, which was so ideal for me, and working with kids from pre-k to grade eight.  i didn't have experience in a school, but i knew it was where i wanted to be.  in the last year, i had talked to many people in maine, trying to gather information on school counseling... it was the shift i wanted to make in my field, and it's been amazing to watch god put all of the pieces together.

i don't write much about my job on my blog since it's so confidential in nature, but i'm tearing up as i type this, just thinking about the sweet little faces i have in my office every day, gathered around my table for daily lunch groups, talks over play doh or my little sandbox or a game of checkers.  these little ones entrust me every day with details of their lives, the hurts of their hearts or the things that make them smile, and i feel so blessed to be a part of their lives.

the school i work at is in a rural community, about 40 minutes from where i live.  it's quite a drive, but i wouldn't want to be anywhere else.  it's a school where my aunt had her first teaching job over twenty years ago, and the same place two of my best friends from high school grew up.  i am so thankful to be a part of such a wonderful school and community and am so excited to watch these students grow and blossom into beautiful young adults.  it's by far the hardest job i've ever had, but i love it so much it makes the stressful, difficult, busy parts so so worth it.

incredibly thankful for god's provision and his leading me into this field that i love so much.  so grateful to work with such a fantastic group of people.  and ever so blessed to be a part of these young lives.

instafriday.

first "elf" watching of the season

thankful: when mom makes us almond puff... a taste of my childhood on a plate

four kids equals lots of craziness but there is lots of cuteness too.  like this.

naptime, i welcome thee.

my husband just went and got me this after a horrific weekend with my still-recovering-from-croup three year old.  he's a good, good man.

just looking cute.

pumpkin chocolate chip goodness

they say rewards for positive behavior are best when immediate: which means ice cream fro breakfast for my girl who stayed in bed all night (clearly i didn't really think all of this through when i picked ice cream as her incentive).

savoring every last bit of her babyishness.

the only blessing of our little ones not feeling well; the still moments of them snuggled on our chests

fresh out of the oven

days of gratitude: {5} my childhood.

{source}

i remember when i was in college, telling my dad that i had been blessed with the best childhood.

really.  it was pretty great.  i have such happy memories of playing at the beach in the summers, picking strawberries and catching fireflies on warm summer evenings, running barefoot through the backyard.  playing outside until it was dark in the colder months, mom making us mugs of warm hot chocolate and laying on my back in the snow, laughing until i couldn't catch my breath.

i had the best parents ever.  dad played games with us the minute he got home from work.  i still remember playing hide and go seek while mom was cooking dinner, and how i could never figure out how he managed to end up in places i'd already looked.  it was like magic.  and if anyone could do it my dad certainly could.  my mom was always taking care of us and making our home a place of continual warmth and comfort.  i remember being at school and thinking "i can't wait to find out what mom is making for dinner", she was the best cook.  i never realized what security i found in warm meals every night as a family around our table, or a neat and clean home, until i was away in college.  she gave that to us.  security, warmth, comfort.

we were raised to know and love the lord.  my dad helped us memorize god's word and my mom took us to children's choir practice at church every week.  we were taught that we were inextricably valuable because god loved us and his grace had saved us.  besides the love and security given to us by our parents, it was this merciful, unconditional affection from our heavenly father that was the very foundation of how we saw ourselves.

every sunday we'd gather at my grandparents house after church to share a family meal.  they were a huge part of our lives, and we were their only grandchildren so our bond was extra special.  we loved spending the night at their house (i still did occasionally when i was in college), going for rides (which always included a stop for ice cream) and playing cards out on their front porch.  there were sleepovers at my aunt's and uncle's house which always included delicious popcorn (i still can't make it like my aunt did), a movie or two (they had the biggest movie library i had ever seen) and junk food that our mom never had in the house.

i had (and still have) a sister who was like a built in best friend.  although, back then, we fought a little too much and had yet to realize how great of friends we would really become.  who can fully and totally understand you and your life experiences like your sister?  i am continually thankful for her and our friendship.  in fact, i don't know where i'd be without her in my life.  we'd sleep in our basement in the summers because it was much cooler than the rest of the house.  it was there that we'd keep each other awake for hours, perfecting our duets to "point of grace" and "out of eden" (christian music groups from the 90s... i know some of you lived on this music too, don't lie), laughing at things no one else would understand and talking about boys we thought were cute, promising each other that we wouldn't tell.

there were basketball games, family vacations, holiday traditions, school plays, game nights, summer picnics and lots of billy joel played over the stereo.

when i was in high school, our house was one of the places everyone wanted to be.  my parents were those parents; the ones that were awesome and people loved being around them.  mom would cook for everyone, and dad would talk and talk and talk... they always took such joy in having lots of kids around, and being a home away from home for many of our friends.

as nick&i raise our girls, i hope and pray that they have the childhood memories that i have when they look back on these years.  the "good old days" are now.  memories are always waiting to be made... even in the simplest things.  so as i clean up the kitchen after dinner in the evenings, and i watch nick on the floor as the girls climb on him and laughter fills the house, i can't help but tear up thinking that maybe they will feel as blessed one day as i do right now.

i know they say "the best is yet to come", but i say i am so very thankful for all the years and memories leading up to this very minute.

instafriday.

so thankful for my girlfriends; nineteen years and going strong!

i heart portland.

shopping + starbucks.  the red cups make me happy.

jillian michaels has nothing on our emmy ems.

dress up goggle-style

crafty sisters

give thanks

chocolate milkshakes=my secret weapon to getting my croup patient drink!

give thanks bunting.

i'm such a sucker for christmas.  always have been, always will be.  we've been listening to christmas music for a couple of weeks now, and my kids have already started watching christmas movies.  i am itching to get our house decorated for the season, but since we are hosting thanksgiving this year i figure i need to keep it fall-ish for a bit longer.

i've been meaning to make a bunting for our hutch for a while now and i finally got around to doing it.  i had thought of a few different ways to make my banner, and tried to decide what word i wanted to use... i decided on "give thanks" because i love that it reflects on action--a choice--to reflect on what we are grateful for.  so important, and a great reminder.  i had a few different designs in mind, but i kind of just went with the flow and ended up with this:

 here's how you can make your own!

give thanks bunting

supplies:
* fabric
* canvas dropcloth (you'll only need a bit, so you will have a bunch leftover for other projects!)
* glue gun
* ribbon
* mini clothespins

- trace or free hand your letters onto your fabric.  i chose to write them on the backside of my fabric so that when i cut them out the ink wouldn't show as much.  if you do this, be sure to draw your letters backwards!

- cut out your letters.  also cut squares out of your dropcloth; one for each letter.  i didn't measure, i kind of just used one as a template so they were all pretty similar.  it turns out that i like stuff a bit shabby and eclectic in nature so that i don't have to be too much of a perfectionist :)

- if you need to, make sure you iron your letters and your dropcloth.  no wrinkles or creases!

- using a glue gun, attach your fabric letters to each square of dropcloth.

- secure a ribbon to wherever you are hanging your bunting.  use your mini clothespins to attach each square. because of the phrase i used, i needed to do two rows in order to fit all of my letters.  i also added a few bookpage leaves (remember this project?) so it coordinated with my centerpiece.

:

voila!  easy as pie.  you're done and ready to host a pretty thanksgiving feast.  well, except for the cooking part.  speaking of pie...

happy bunting-making!

this post is linked to these *lovely* blogs:

liz marie

days of gratitude: {4} my daughters.

i have always known in my heart that i was meant to be a mama.

although i grew up dreaming of having my own family someday, i could have never prepared myself for what it would be like to be the mom of two of the most precious girls.

my daughters are my world, and being their mama has changed my life.  i may get frustrated, impatient or lose my cool on a daily basis, but my eyes fill with happy tears and my heart melts into a puddle just as much; if not more.  and those moments make the hard ones more than worth it.  the hardest job, being a parent is.  but the toughest roles heed the greatest blessings.

and oh, how they bless me.  on a daily basis.

i'll never forget when nick&i first started talking about and praying through starting to add to our family.  there were so many things we feared and that made us anxious.  but we could have never even imagined the ways our hearts would burst with love for these little ones, our daughters.  i'll never forget when they were placed in our arms for the first time, how we cried.  it was then that we knew our lives would never be the same.

i'm so thankful for their personalities, and how different they are.  my bella, my little sweetheart.  strong willed and dramatic, and ever so kind and tender.  she tugs at my heart every single day with her affectionate hugs and kisses and sweet words.  my emmy, my little sunshine.  naughty and impish, and ever so funny and full of joy.  she makes me laugh all the time and brings such cheer every where she goes with her sweet smile and jovial spirit.  when i watch them play, i can't help but smile.  when i watch them with others, i can't help but be proud.  they have their daddy's kind eyes, sweet spirit and his smile that lights up any room.  i absolutely love seeing how god has woven our qualities together in our girls.  they are such extensions of who we are... in both good ways and bad.  and through all the imperfections we love each other no matter what.

oh, how i love these girls.

from rocking them before bed to caring for them when they're sick... from watching them experience life with wide eyed wonder to drying their tears as my own heart breaks... from the pitter patter of their footsteps down the hall to their kisses and contagious laughter... and everywhere in between...

i'm so grateful for this journey with my daughters.
so thankful for these little ones who light up my life.
can't think of a greater honor than to be chosen as their mama.

what's for dinner tonight {cornmeal cake}.

it was a cold day here in new england, so i had a big pot of chicken tortilla soup simmering on the stove.  i have a killer cornbread recipe, but it has a ton of butter in it and i felt like something lighter.  so, after a bit of research i found this... cornmeal cake (or, if you want to get technical bolo de fuba, but i can't even pronounce that so i'll just call it cornmeal cake).

oh.my.goodness.  

if you're looking for a typical cornbread, don't try this... but if you want something a bit different (and lighter), this is for you.  the cake is fluffier and sweeter than your run of the mill cornbread and it bakes in layers; the edges and top a bit crispy and the bottom is a delicious custard-like consistency.  just typing this makes me want to run to the kitchen and grab another piece.  

here's the recipe.

cornmeal cake

* 3 c. skim or lowfat milk
* 4 eggs
* 1 1/2 c. yellow cornmeal
* 1 1/4 c. sugar
* 1 1/2 T. flour
* 2 1/2 T. butter, melted
* 1 T. baking powder
* 2 T. parmesan cheese

- preheat oven to 350.  spray 9x13 pan with baking spray.
- place first 6 ingredients in a blender, and blend for about one minute.  add baking powder and parmesan cheese and blend on low just until incorporated (a few seconds).
- pour mixture into greased pan and bake for about 50 minutes, or until golden brown and a knife comes out clean when inserted into the center.
- allow cake to rest for 20 minutes before serving.  it's especially delicious warm.

enjoy!

{sidenote:} this recipe is another great find from the blog skinnytaste!  if you're watching what you eat, this is a great resource.  every recipe is made lighter, and provides all of the nutrition information for you to figure your calories (and weight watchers points!)  check it out; i love it!