the lasts.

i am a savor-er of "lasts".  the last snow of the winter.  the last day of a family vacation.  the last page of a good book.  the last slice of a delicious pie.  and more times than not, the important lasts will often bring a flood of tears from the deep places of my sentimental soul (and when i say "important lasts", that could even include sadness over an empty pie plate... depending on what kind of day it is).

a couple of weeks ago, i savored a special last day, and one that hurt my heart a little bit.  it was a last the Lord had spent the whole past year preparing me for... a last that i pictured coming from the time i held a precious bundle in my arms, memorizing the softness of her cheeks, her wild hair and the way her chest rose and fell as she slept.  it the last day before my first baby started school... full time, every day, big girl school.  the last day of sharing my weeks with her.  the last day of being able to have popcorn and movie days snuggled in my bed on cold afternoons in january.  the last day of going to the library or walking through the leaves on a crisp, autumn morning.  the last day of watching her skip along the sidewalk downtown on our way to get bagels from our favorite shop.  the last day of lazy mornings in our pj's, watching cartoons.  the last day of watching her run and play at our favorite playground...one that she has grown up on over the last few years.

the last day of being a stay at home mom to my oldest.  

it's a strange thing to watch a season of your life end.  to me, it wasn't that my baby was starting kindergarten.  it was that the days as we have known them for the last five years were coming to a close.  and that was what held me in a stunned place as i heartachingly tried to savor the last.

the "last day" was a sweet ending to this precious season in my life.  we celebrated with some of our favorites, including lunch at the bagel shop downtown and a trip to that favorite park of ours.  as i watched her swing her way across the monkey bars and climb with strength and confidence, a smile across her face as her hair wildly spilled in to her eyes, i couldn't help but fight tears.  not necessarily out of sadness, but out of awe at how she has grown.  i pictured the tiny little peanut she was when we first started taking outings to this particular park.  how i hurried to stay right on her heels as she tottered and stumbled over the bridges and up the steps.  how i kissed many boo boos and wiped countless tears as she fell and failed all over that playground.  wispy pigtails, chubby cheeks and all.  and now...there i was, sitting back and watching my free spirited little beauty play without fear or any need for my help.  and that was just the assurance i needed.  she didn't need me in the ways that she always had.  she was ready to blossom... and i needed to let go to let her.  to give her over to the One who would always catch her when she fell, and trust that He was never going to let her go.  

and now, here we are... a few weeks into kindergarten and wouldn't you know?  she's doing just fine without me.  more than fine, actually.  and so am i.  

the problem with being a savor-er of lasts, is that you can be wary of celebrating the firsts... and treasuring all of the moments in between. change can be hard, especially for this mama, but it is in the change where the Lord has space to do His work and accomplish His purposes.  paul tells us in philippians "one thing i do: forgetting what lies behind, and reaching forward to what lies ahead, i press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." i think paul is trying to encourage us to not be fixated on the past, stuck in our regrets, or mourning our lasts.  but instead, to move forward, embracing all of the seasons of life and the blessings that can be found, even in all of the changes.  

i'm so very thankful for the season i was given to be at home with my bella girl... even with all of its challenges and wanting-to-pull-my-hair-out moments, i wouldn't trade our time together for anything.  and i am so excited to continue to watch her spread her wings and for Jesus to use her to change the world.  and i know that won't happen unless there was a last to savor... and also, a first to celebrate.

thank you, Lord for all of the moments in life... help me to treasure each one and be fully alive wherever you have me.

even in the lasts.

to new adventures.

{source}

one of my favorite places to be in the world is my tiny, yellow, sunshine-y kitchen.

i know that sounds so very nineteen twenties, but it's true.  although most of the time i'm wearing pajama pants, and i've never cooked in a dress much less a pearl necklace... nineteen twenties housewife i am not.

but, i love to be in the kitchen.

making food for others makes me happy.  i love the coziness of chowder and biscuits on a snowy winter night.  or dinner fresh off the grill on our back deck in the evening summer sunlight.  an elderly couple lives in our backyard, and when the weather is nice, we are continually exchanging baked goods.  a couple slices of pie, a plate of cookies... and that just makes me smile.  this kind of bonding and friendship formed over food has such a sense of nostalgia to it.  and i just love that.  nick&i love opening our home up to friends and family to sit around our table.  i absolutely love sharing food and company with others, which i most definitely learned from my mom who did this on a regular basis.

and my daughters?  well, they love playing with their kitchen and are constantly pulling chairs over to the counter, wanting to help me cook.  their favorite thing to watch is the food network, which just makes my heart so happy.  emmy woke up from her nap the other day and looked up at me with her big brown eyes "giada, mama?" yes.  giada, barefoot contessa and pioneer women.  they are some of their favorites.

for the past few years, i have stradled the world of working parttime and staying in my career field and being a stay at home mom.  i work two days a week in a job a ABSOLUTELY adore; an elementary school counselor.  it's so tough, but it really doesn't get any better than what i do.  i love it.  and i feel so blessed to be able to stay at home with my girls on the other days a week.  nick&i have been praying for a few years now how we could bring in some extra income without having to spend too much extra time away from our family...

{enter:} the pampered chef.

i never dreamed that i would have an at home business one day, and alas here i am.  and it has been one of the best decisions i've made in a while.  i grew up knowing all about the pampered chef because my mom loved their products and we always had them in our kitchen.  i remember being a poor college student, starting out in my first apartment with my best friends and i owned nothing... but i had a pampered chef batter bowl and garlic press, so i felt fancy.  i had never even been to a party, let alone thought of becoming a consultant.  however, one of my best friends from high school has been an independent consultant with the pampered chef for a few years now, and watching her success began to definitely perk my curiosity.  whenever i'd go to her house for a visit, i was amazed at how her kitchen overflowed with their products, and how much she used them while we were preparing food for ourselves and the flock of children between us all.  i started talking to her more about the opportunity and asking lots of questions and then seriously started considering it this fall.  

i mean, food + talking + people??  three of my favorite things.  totally up my alley.

so, i signed up the very end of december and started this new year as an independent pampered chef consultant.  you guys: let me just say, it has literally blown me away.  i know what you're thinking (or may be thinking), i was skeptical of these types of business too.  but i absolutely love this company and it has been a tremendous blessing to myself personally, but also to my family.

i love that i get to set my own hours; i am my own boss!  because i already work part-time, i shoot for a party a week, and some of those are even done through facebook which is super amazing because i can be on my couch in my pj's (i think that's the second time i've talked about being in my pajamas on this post; yeah, they're pretty much my favorite thing to wear).  i'm constantly meeting new people; which is so fun!  i dropped a catalog off to a customer i had never met before last week, and just days later the girls and i were at her house for a playdate.  i love getting to sit and talk to people and hearing their stories, which i get to do often during my shows.  not to mention the fact that i get to have weekly girls nights, hanging with other women, cooking for them and shopping together.  and ontop of all of that, i get free products, a chance to go on a free vacation (this year it's disneyland!!) AND a paycheck.  last month, i doubled my normal part-time income and the best part is: i only left the house three times!

i'm super passionate about sharing what i love and letting others know about it, which is why i try to share my story with this new adventure.  it's been such a blessing to me and my family, i can't keep it to myself!  and i'm in love with all of the pampered chef products and could talk about them all day long (i'm not even kidding).  they have made cooking in my kitchen so much easier and enjoyable!  i've just started a detox/healthy eating plan (that i'll be sharing more about later!) and my pampered chef kitchen tools and products have made it so easy.  one meal i counted i had used at least seven different tools.  i'm obsessed.

if you'd like any more information on this opportunity, feel free to contact me at megvcornwell@gmail.com.  i'd love to share more and answer any questions you may have!  ontop of cooking shows and facebook parties we also do bridal showers and fundraising which is a really great option too.  i really love helping others enjoy cooking for their families and friends and having the tools and recipes to do so easily in their own homes.  saving money and becoming healthier.  

and making those cozy memories around your dining room table.  

because that's really what it's all about.

when i'm an older mom...

{source}

my kids are always a little crazy.  by nature, they are active and silly and strong willed and love to dance.  on my impatient days, it makes me want to poke my eyes out.  but on my good days, i love it.  no, it's not easy.  but i'm thankful that they are just what they're meant to be... kids.

these days, they are particularly nuts.  i mean, every mama of littles in the month of december deserves a trophy or something.  or a trip to the spa.  or just a really, really long nap.  because wow... their normal bouncing-of-the-wallness quadruples during this month.  i've found myself praying for an extra measure of patience and grace because... their extra energy and excitement is hard to take at times, but watching my girls at christmastime; well, there's just nothing like it.

today, we met up with some of our good friends for lunch at our favorite place, the bagel shop downtown.  the kids were all extra excited to see each other, and us mamas were getting together for one last time, as one of our dear friends is moving away.  we sat, making our best attempt to carry on a conversation while our kids ate their bagels and we tried to wipe smeared cream cheese from their faces and fingers.  it didn't take long for them to be finished, and they were getting... well... even more excited...

they began to dance and sing (a little loudly) and chase each other in a circle.  they giggled and they got a little louder, and they listened as we scooched down to tell them they needed to be a bit more quiet.  and then, it was time to go and there were tantrums and spilled water and tears and flailing... and embarrassed moms, and bottom lips bitten and flushed cheeks.  and after we got them bundled up and wrestled them to the door, an older lady stopped us and offered an unwelcomed suggestion: "maybe next time you should bring crayons."

and the exhausted and flustered mamas were now just annoyed, defeated and discouraged.  alright, lady: do you remember what it was like wrangling your kids to the door to get ready for an outing?  and on a -11 degree day?  there are jackets, there are mittens and hats and boots... and then your own jacket, mittens and boots... and the check to bring to the bank, and the letter to mail at the post office, and the shopping list to bring to the store... no time to even think about bringing crayons.  goodness, it's a success story that i'm even leaving the house at all.

moments like this make me think how hard it is to be a young mom.  we've all been offered unwelcomed suggestions from complete strangers and it can get downright discouraging.  it's also made me consider how i can encourage young moms when i'm in a later season of life.  because isn't that what we should be doing for each other?

i've also been on the other side of this.  when older moms have encouraged me, it has meant the world. after all, they know more than anyone what this thing called motherhood is like.  when they show interest in my children and geniunely enjoy them.  when they help me when i'm sick, or when they leave an unexpected treat at my doorstep.  when they take my girls to do something not only so that i can have a second to breathe, but also because they love my babies.  now that is a blessing.

and so i vow to myself that when i'm an older mom, and my kids have grown... i will remember what it's like to be in charge of tiny, independent, excitable, full of energy little ones.  i will think how i can help; maybe i can be the one to wipe up the spilled water.  maybe open a door, or let a mom of little ones have my place in line.  i will try to pay attention to see who might need some extra help, some encouragement, a bright spot in their day.  i will be patient with their children and treat them as blessings, not as annoyances.  and i will approach mamas in public--not to give them advice or to state my opinion--but to merely say "hang in there, mama; you're doing a good job."

because us mamas need to hear that more often.  it's the hardest job we'll ever have.

it won't be like this for long.

rain is tapping on my windows as i sit, cozy and wrapped in a blanket on my couch.  my house is quiet.

can you believe it?  yes, quiet.

the girls are still sleeping, and i take this rare opportunity to relish the silence and pray, asking god to fill my heart with all that i need for this day.

raising two toddlers is not for the faint of heart.  and lately, my house has been ravaged by the chaos that is a one and a three year old in cahoots with one another, in a plan to overtake us all.  as a person that likes things nice and neat, i've had to learn to live with the toys that are constantly strewn all over our living room and kitchen.  pillows that are thrown off of every surface and shoes, bags and purses that are carried throughout the house by little hands that love to put things in places i will never find them (thanks, emmy).

bella loves to sneak emmy in the bathroom while she's on the potty, allowing her to have full access to our cupboard and toilet paper... and within minutes i'm chasing her from room to room as she shoves all of our toothbrushes into her mouth and shrieks from naughty laughter.

my girls are so so sweet...and they are also so so mischievous.

lately i have felt as though they are in a plot to drive me insane.  i want to throw up my white flag and say "fine!  the house is yours!  the mortgage is due on the fifteenth of every month!" and walk out the door.

just kidding.

but seriously.  it's been exhausting.  on the upside: at least they're getting along.

in the midst of this insanity, nick&i constantly remind ourselves that it won't be like this for long.  it's the free therapy we give each other... but it's also a continual, sobering reminder that we will miss these sweet days, as crazy and harried as they may be.

the past week, social media has been bursting with back to school photos of everyone's children.  and the common theme: "where did time go?" say the mamas.  it passes all too quickly.

there are more important things--much more important things--than having my house clean, or keeping emmy out of the toothbrushes (although that's the goal).  i try to take many moments to sit with the girls, or to simply watch them play when i feel as though i should be doing the dishes or folding the laundry.  why?  because it won't be like this for long.

so here's to hoping that i'll remember all of this when i want to pull all my hair out today (because most likely that will happen at some point).  that i'll hold my babies close and whisper prayers of thanks, even if i find a whole roll of toilet paper bunched into a wad on the bathroom floor.

mamas, you know what i'm talking about.

let's make today a good day.  and just in case we need a reminder, give this song a listen.  and try--just try--not to cry.

embracing fall.

i've been really teary thinking about this summer being over.

it's been great.  really, really great.  we've filled it with memories, trips to the coast, endless playdates and picnics at the park, tons of beach days, family time and a two week jaunt to texas.  my girls are growing, and endings of seasons for me are hard.  a continual reminder that i cannot stop time.  i am unable to keep my girls little; each day that ends brings us closer to chapters closing.  one day closer to the day they are all grown up and leave this house.

i know, depressing, huh?

but i'm a realist.  and super sentimental.  so naturally, endings are hard for me.

and who doesn't love summer in maine?  beautiful weather, long evenings as the melting sun glows through the trees.  fireflies, backyard fires, the smell of sunscreen and drippy ice cream cones.  nick&i both work in schools, so summer is especially relaxing for our little family.  a break from routine, time to slow a bit and savor.

and savor, i did.

until today.

this week has been especially trying for me and it's only tuesday.  today i found emmy eating her poop, bella dumping the sugar bowl all over the couch, and the two of them playing in a puddle of water on the kitchen floor that was created by sneaking my water bottle and emptying it everywhere.  i swear they teamed up this morning in a plan to make this day as rough as possible for their mama.  to make matters worse, i feel like i've constantly been yelling, saying "no", getting frustrated and have generally felt like i'm going to lose my mind.  they have been so great all summer.  like, too-good-to-be-true great.  until this week.  which honestly may be the lord preparing my heart to go back to work.  for which i am thankful.

life has a way of naturally preparing us for transition and change, whether we formerly thought we were ready or not.  i needed a day like today to snap me out of my sentimentality, embrace the end of this season and welcome another.  no more tears for the end of summer.  today was an instant cure for the back-to-work blues.  i am laying in bed, eyes swollen from tears of exhaustion and frustration while nick bathes the girls and gets them ready for the night.  stick a fork in me.  i'm done.

every end of something good, brings the beginning of something that will be just as beautiful.  even if it's hard.   even if it's sad.  even if it takes a while to adjust.   there are blessings along the way that have yet to be seen.  and it's the unseen and unknown that makes the endings hard and sad.  and that's okay.

as our house says goodbye to summer, we say hello to this next season.  as we dive into our routine tomorrow, we embrace fall.  fall and it's football and cool weather.  sweatshirts and all things pumpkin.  chilly air and apple pie.  first snows and the anticipation of the holidays.

and tonight, i embrace it.  in fact, i welcome it.  hello, fall.  summer has been good, but we are ready for you.  in a few short months, it will be summer again.  but until then, we have lots of new memories to make and new blessings and gifts to be given.

and i am excited for all that god has for us.

on my heart.

i have class on monday evenings.  as much as i hate leaving the girls while they are napping in their beds, it sometimes serves as a refreshing break in the "outside world".  it also gives me a renewed vigor to return home in time to scoop them up, squeeze them tight and help tuck them in, after a flurry of books, songs and bedtime prayers.

tonight as i made my way up our front walk, i peered into our living room windows and through the lace veil of our curtain panels i spied bella sitting on the couch.  she was freshly bathed, hair wet, donning her elmo jammies and her eyes were fixed on a bible story dvd that we sometimes let her watch before bed.  i climbed up on our porch and looked more closely through the window until her eyes caught mine.  upon seeing me, her face broke out in the brightest smile, excitement of my arrival home causing her to bounce and giggle.  she was at the door before i could open it, flinging herself into my arms.

i thought to myself "these are the moments i never want to forget".  these are the moments that make the struggle worth it.  that spur me on when i'm tired, frustrated, drained and overwhelmed.

that cause my heart to feel as though it will burst i love these sweet ones so much.

i saw this photo circling around facebook tonight, and it summed up what's on my heart so perfectly.

{source}

life is fleeting.  drink in all of the moments, breathe through the hard ones, and treasure today.  being able to laugh doesn't hurt, either.

and love.  always love.

days like today.

my sweet girls,

i just wanted to tell you the days like these are my favorite.  we haven't done much all day, but we've been together.  in our pajamas.  just the three of us.

i've been working on laundry, and it's scattered in folded piles all over the living room.  i'm trying not to care.  i have much better uses of my time this morning: you.

 bella, you&i made chocolate chip cookies while emmy, you watched from your bouncer seat.  bel, the kitchen became a disaster fast because you wanted to do everything on your own.  flour went everywhere.  i have to bite my tongue often and remember that you having memories of cooking with me is far more important than the endless sprinkles of flour littering my once-clean kitchen.

and i always want to make memories.

one of my favorite things to do is turn music up loud and the three of us dance through the kitchen.  emmy, you're too little so i hold you.  and it's my *favorite*.  because i love how your chubby little cheeks feel pressed against mine.  i can't stop kissing them!  you laugh as we spin around and i shimmy you from side to side.  you are so happy; your smiles are contagious and you just ooze with such sweetness.

bella, you LOVE to dance.  and i love watching you.  you like dancing with your dolls; this morning you twirled belle all over the dining room.  as you spun in circles you said "mama!  you dancin with emmy, i dancin with belle!"  you are the cutest thing.  even though you tested out markers on our couch and the dining room table, threw fits all morning and wanted me to hold you every second.  i still love you and your sister more than life.  my heart literally feels like it will explode sometimes.

you girls and your daddy are the biggest blessings god has ever given to me.  you are some of the sweetest joys of my life; you fill my heart until its overflowing. i can't tell you how much i love being your mama.

days like today are the best.

love you with all my heart,
mama

a day in pictures.

 morning sweetness

bella's random collections

making masterpieces

bathtime

towel wrapped

mama squeezes

blueberry bagels & princess plates

flowers from my love

naptime swaddle

hot summer days

open windows

pretty baby

stylin shades

bathing beauties

longtime friends


creating memories.  savoring moments.  making each day count.

clearly not a fan of clean-up-time.

this is was our morning today: bella emptying the tupperware cupboard all over the floor and me cleaning up, only to have her empty it five seconds later.

i decided this morning that my new parenting effort is going to be introducing the concept of cleaning up. even if she doesn't understand for a while, i still want bella to get used to picking up after herself.

this was how "clean up time" went this morning: (pardon her wearing-only-a-diaper-and-crazy-just-woke-up-hair look... we are in the middle of a heat advisory in the northeast. doesn't leave much room for fashion)

yes. that was my daughter. running away the minute i said "let's clean up!" (but definitely taking the time to do a little dance in the middle of the tupperware she had strewn allll over the floor). i even sang the clean up song and everything.

oh dear.

she said "gleeba"!

confused by this title? not a "friends" fan, then i assume (i think nick and i have watched all ten seasons from start to finish at least three times through in the almost-three-years we've been married. we love it, what can i say). to summarize: rachel is "talking" on the phone to her baby girl and excitedly proclaims that emma said her first word... "gleeba". now that i have a child, that sequence makes me chuckle a bit more. as parents, we are always looking for what our child may be learning, accomplishing, saying, doing... and we may get a little too excited over things that aren't really a big deal (or, in the case of the friends episode, words like "gleeba" which aren't really words at all).

i promise this post isn't an example of this... or at least i will try my very best not to be one of those parents.

(you all know exactly what i'm talking about)

i just want to try to write everything down and remember every little thing of this stage of bella's development because it has been one of my *favorites*. so far, at least :)

like any other parent of a ten month old, i am daily amazed at how my daughter is changing. it is unbelievable! since i have completely dropped the ball on her baby book (one of my biggest mama-guilt-sources), i want to document these things somewhere... and then one of these days i can sit down and catch up on that dad-gum baby book. here are a few things that bella grace is up to these days...

-crawling.

a couple weeks ago, she was trying so hard to master the art of crawling. she would take one stride and fall. and then eventually just roll her way to wherever she needed to go (which she still does from time to time... this girl hasn't stopped rolling for months). then, one friday morning after a week of struggle, i was in the kitchen making breakfast and i looked up to find my sweet pea crawling like she had been for her whole life. now she is incredibly speedy and we've had to close doors to the rooms we don't want her in or else who knows where she will end up before we can catch her!

- pulling up.

she is pulling up like a pro... and she loves it. whenever i go in to get her out of her crib now in the mornings or after naps, this is what i find:

between pulling up and crawling, whenever i go to change her diaper her sweet lil knees are always red!

- dancing.

we've found a new love, bella and me. in the mornings, after breakfast we play music and dance around the living room. she LOVES it. she has the sweetest little belly laugh and inhaling noise she does now when she's excited and it's just the cutest. when i picked her up from the church nursery this past sunday, the nursery workers excitedly told me "she has some moves!" they said they put on music and bella started dancing (she loves shrugging her shoulders up and down to the music... i told you she has moves). ahhhhhh so cute! she makes her king-of-the-dance-moves-daddy very proud.

- touchdown!

when i was a baby, my parents taught me how to raise my arms above my head in the to sign "touchdown" whenever they would say it. we started doing this with bella a while ago, and now she has it mastered. it is one of the cutest things i've ever seen. she gets really into it and arches her back and looks way up at the sky and then starts clapping for herself and saying "yaaaaayyy".

-mealtime.

she is doing soooo well with table food! she loves eating cut up grapes, bananas, chunks of avocado, pears, peaches, summer squash, pineapple, blueberries, broccoli, cauliflower and carrots! she loves oatmeal, torn up grilled cheese sandwiches, waffles, cinnamon raisin english muffins and loves when mama and daddy give her some of their saffron rice... mmmmm. she also completely digs graham crackers and does well with ground turkey and chicken that i puree. she has always been in the 25th percentile for weight, our lil peanut, but when we took her into the dr today, she had successfully broken into the 50th :)

-no no.

even though she likes to pretend that she doesn't hear us when we say the word "no", this proves that she really does listen...

-kisses!

one of the sweetest things she's doing these days is "giving" kisses... which really means leaning in and letting us kiss her on the forehead. and making a "mah" sound as she's doing the obligatory "lean in". ohhhhhh i love her.

- a few of her favorite things...

*getting in bed with mama&daddy on weekend mornings!

*baby einstein, but she has a greater love for praisebaby (which makes mama thankful!)

*riding on daddy's shoulders

*chewing on mama's scarfs and necklaces...and earrings...and whatever else she can find

*olivia kate, vivian and luke... the kiddos mama watches and bella's bff's

*pulling out her hairbows and ponytails

*peek-a-boo

*her ellie (her stuffed animal that's an elephant/blanket) and mama's old baby blanket

*trying to go after daddy's xbox and the controllers (i think the fact that we always say "no" makes them MUCH more appealing...)

*shrieking at the top of her lungs (we're trying to work on this... but really; how much can you work on this with a ten month old?! and when she's excited its cute... when she's mad? not so much. *sigh*)

*making her "excited" face

*reading books (she has a little reading "nook" in between the recliner and couch where all of her books are, and we often find her there :)

*phones and shoes. uh oh. this does not bode well for the future teenaged girl years.

*mum-mums. by the dozen.

i can't get over how much i love my lil sweet pea. she has completely stolen my heart and nick&i have found such joy in being her mama and daddy. my favorite time with her every day is when she first wakes up in the morning. i love the smile on her face when she sees me and how she excitedly begins bopping up and down on her knees. when i pick her up, she squeezes me and lays her head on my shoulder... it may be just for a second before she's wanting to get down and play, but it's one of the best seconds. ever.

i love you so much, my sweet bella grace! you are one of the greatest joys and blessings of my life and i love being your mama.

thursday three.

well, it's 11:43 and i had fallen asleep but woke up to a huge coughing fit. we are seeming to pass allergies and colds around this house and it's kind of a drag. i decided to get up and use my trusty netti pot and get some water, while also allowing time for my husband (who i undoubtedly startled half to death with my racking coughs) to fall blissfully off to sleep once again.

and here i sit.

which gives me time to write the thursday three in the fifteen minutes i have left before it is no longer thursday.

nick
miracle of all miracles this week is no guessing game (although i guessed it right on my first try... i told you i know the mind of my husband!) i actually remembered to ask nick today what his top moment of the week was... and alas, it was going to the mavs game last night with three of his best friends for *free*. that's right, people... f-r-e-e. love that! his friend matt won free tickets because he won some score-guessing-contest (and actually guessed the score to a mavs game spot on which is pretty crazy) and was awarded four free tickets to last night's mavs game against the jazz. i know my husband acted like the crazy sports fan that he is; complete with his mavs t-shirt, screaming&yelling and his giant-number-one-foam-hand waving in the air (just kidding on the giant hand... but still.) anyone who knows my husband knows he loves his sports, and i just love watching him in action, as does everyone else. love. that. man.

meg
i would have to say my highlight of the week may sound like a shallow one, but please hear me out... these days shopping for myself is an extremely rare occasion. but as i have been learning over the past several months, the lord reminded me of again this week: god always takes care of our needs... and sometimes he chooses to take care of our wants. this week with some sale-watching, coupon clipping and store credit at the gap, i managed to snag a pair of $70 skinny jeans for a mere twenty bucks. yep, i loved it. almost as much as i love. these. jeans. aaaaand due to a shipping mishap (long story) i also was blessed with a super cute easter dress for bel for practically free. i definitely tend to struggle sometimes with our lack of "things" or the means to obtain "things" especially since we chose to have me be a stay-at-home-mom for our family. i wouldn't have it any other way; it just makes finances a bit tighter. i've been asking jesus to help me with that this week, and to keep my mind stayed on the many things i'm so thankful for. he--as always--has been faithfully changing my heart and helping me focus on the irreplaceable blessings around me that i could never even imagine my life being without. the "things" that are worth *far* more than all the money in the entire world. so that, my friends, is really the highlight of my week :) doesn't mean my struggle is over, but it's always good to have those little reminders... and god is so sweet to give them.

bel
our poor little sweetie has not been feeling so hot the past few days. she's had a runny nose, cough and just doesn't look or act like herself. it's quite sad. but this has also meant more time in her pjs, more cuddle time with daddy and mama, and more "praisebaby" and "baby einstein" (which we ordinarily limit to a few times a week... but this week i think she has watched one or the other every single day. ahhh well.) i think bella's highlight this week was getting a couple new toys from grammie and grampy! they had given bel her first tea set (plastic, of course) for christmas, and i stashed it in the closet to bring out later when the newness of some of her other christmas toys had worn off. we brought it out this week, much to her excitement in only the way a baby can show it. as soon as she saw the box, she began squealing and kicking her feet with a huge smile on her face. so. cute. so we've been playing "tea" which she hasn't quite gotten the hang of yet and certainly has no manners. the english would be sorely disappointed. for valentines day, grammie and grampy gave her an activity walker that we just picked up this week. it makes lots of noises and has tons of buttons that light up and play songs. it keeps her entertained for a while. hard to imagine that she will soon be pushing it all over the apartment as she waddles behind it! it seems like just yesterday when all she did was lay on a blanket and blink. she has been growing up so fast i think i cry about it every day. just kidding, but i do get teary-eyed. a lot.

and there you have it, friends. our thursday three just before midnight. i will now go back to bed and hopefully be asleep within seconds. stay away, cough. stay away.

mama confessions.

i feel as though it is a "mom trap"... or let me rephrase... a "human trap" to present our lives as though we have everything together. when i woke up this morning, i was faced with the overwhelmingness that is my life right now. our apartment is a wreck. i haven't exercised since who-knows-when. every day i struggle to fit my time with jesus in. it is the end of january and i still feel like i'm getting back into a routine since the holidays. and in some sense, still feel like i'm adjusting to life as a mom. and bella turns eight months old today. (eight months?! where has time gone).

anyone??? please tell me i am not alone!

so here are my mama confessions. lest you think i have it all together.

1. as previously stated, i haven't exercised in a very long time. this is partially due to the state of extreme discomfort&pain that my body was in for months after having bella. but still, i hate it. trying to figure out where to fit that into my daily routine so i can get this bod toned and in shape before swimsuit season... or before i get pregnant again, whichever comes first (kidding, kidding!).

2. i haven't painted my toenails in probably two months. i partially blame winter. and close-toed shoes.

3. i cry everytime i pack away clothes bella has outgrown.

4. if someone could pay me to be a wife, a mom, decorater of our home, meal planner, professional blogger, cook and crafter, i would be as happy as a clam. all the other responsibilities (ahem... cleaning) i would gladly hire someone else to do.

5. speaking of cleaning, i always make sure our apartment is neat and picked up. but finding the energy to clean each week is a chore for me. i am constantly busy and on the go with my part time jobs throughout the week (i work 20+ hrs a week which i am BEYOND thankful for) our mornings at home all i want to do is snuggle with bella, read to her and play with her. i would be perfectly fine if i spent her naptime only drinking coffee, reading, blogging, eating breakfast and watching morning talk shows.

6. i cried the week i stopped nursing.

7. i *thought* i had lost allllll my pregnancy weight... then i found out a couple weeks ago that the scale i was weighing myself on was wrong. ehhhhh. still only have about six pounds to lose. but still. annoying.

8. i kiss bella's cheeks at least thirty five times a day. at LEAST.

9. i wish that nick could get paid to stay at home and hang out with us. i am always sad on mondays when he goes back to work. we miss him!!

10. i think i am about three months behind on bella's baby book. i have a running list in my mind of everything i need to record and write down. ridiculous! this isn't supposed to happen until at least your second baby... my poor future children...

11. i have all the ingredients to make sugar cookies in my pantry. i was meaning to make them for the girls on nick's basketball team... before christmas break. ooops.

phew. glad i got all of that off my chest. am i alone in all of these things? please, other mamas... help me out here.

crafts are not just for old ladies.

yes, i said it. and i believe it: crafts are not just for old ladies (although i did just turn 30... so maybe some people would consider me to be an old lady...)

when i was little, i always had creative projects going on. always. i cross-stitched. i colored and drew. i loved to bake. and i had multiple notebooks that i would write stories in... i wanted to be an author (which, by the way, is something i've been thinking more about lately. i mean, apparently all you need to do is write a book about vampires falling in love for a bunch of teenaged girls and you are set for life. LIFE.)

over the years, i became guarded and self-conscious. i didn't want to create things unless i knew that i was going to be good at it... ahhhhh, perfectionism. such a kill-joy.

perhaps one of the greatest challanges to me since becoming a stay-at-home mom is finding ways to not lose my identity and sense of who i am. i always want to be growing, creating, and finding new ways to enjoy life and evolve in the woman i am. not just the important ways (growing more in my love for and knowledge of jesus, finding ways to minister to others, becoming a better wife, growing as a mom, etc) but in little ways too.

so... i decided to bite the bullet and, in turn, i got bitten...by the craft bug.

{yes, craft bugs do exist}

when christmas was coming around the corner, nick&i looked over our finances and decided we would need to be real creative with christmas gifts this year. so, i decided to make things. and it was really fun. and i think it was special to those that recieved our handmade gifts (again: i think so).

here are a few of my creations...

- flower hair clips!

some organza ones...



and some felt ones...




- a picture frame (with an organza flower, covered button and some rosettes... don't be fooled: that's NOT bel and me in the frame. just wanted to clear up any confusion.)

- a cake plate stand (i forgot to take a picture of the one i made, but this is what it looked like; minus the crystal knob in the center)

- hand-stitched felt pillows for my nephews

a texas rangers one for wyatt...

and an owl one for jude...

bella's naptimes became very productive for me... although not so productive for my chores around the house. oh well. i'm hoping to perfect these creations soon and add others so i can start an online botique with my sis! we've already made some really *cool* jewelry and we're trying to build up an inventory to "open" in time for christmas shopping next fall. jude&bella coming soon... you will SO want to shop there.