when i'm an older mom...

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my kids are always a little crazy.  by nature, they are active and silly and strong willed and love to dance.  on my impatient days, it makes me want to poke my eyes out.  but on my good days, i love it.  no, it's not easy.  but i'm thankful that they are just what they're meant to be... kids.

these days, they are particularly nuts.  i mean, every mama of littles in the month of december deserves a trophy or something.  or a trip to the spa.  or just a really, really long nap.  because wow... their normal bouncing-of-the-wallness quadruples during this month.  i've found myself praying for an extra measure of patience and grace because... their extra energy and excitement is hard to take at times, but watching my girls at christmastime; well, there's just nothing like it.

today, we met up with some of our good friends for lunch at our favorite place, the bagel shop downtown.  the kids were all extra excited to see each other, and us mamas were getting together for one last time, as one of our dear friends is moving away.  we sat, making our best attempt to carry on a conversation while our kids ate their bagels and we tried to wipe smeared cream cheese from their faces and fingers.  it didn't take long for them to be finished, and they were getting... well... even more excited...

they began to dance and sing (a little loudly) and chase each other in a circle.  they giggled and they got a little louder, and they listened as we scooched down to tell them they needed to be a bit more quiet.  and then, it was time to go and there were tantrums and spilled water and tears and flailing... and embarrassed moms, and bottom lips bitten and flushed cheeks.  and after we got them bundled up and wrestled them to the door, an older lady stopped us and offered an unwelcomed suggestion: "maybe next time you should bring crayons."

and the exhausted and flustered mamas were now just annoyed, defeated and discouraged.  alright, lady: do you remember what it was like wrangling your kids to the door to get ready for an outing?  and on a -11 degree day?  there are jackets, there are mittens and hats and boots... and then your own jacket, mittens and boots... and the check to bring to the bank, and the letter to mail at the post office, and the shopping list to bring to the store... no time to even think about bringing crayons.  goodness, it's a success story that i'm even leaving the house at all.

moments like this make me think how hard it is to be a young mom.  we've all been offered unwelcomed suggestions from complete strangers and it can get downright discouraging.  it's also made me consider how i can encourage young moms when i'm in a later season of life.  because isn't that what we should be doing for each other?

i've also been on the other side of this.  when older moms have encouraged me, it has meant the world. after all, they know more than anyone what this thing called motherhood is like.  when they show interest in my children and geniunely enjoy them.  when they help me when i'm sick, or when they leave an unexpected treat at my doorstep.  when they take my girls to do something not only so that i can have a second to breathe, but also because they love my babies.  now that is a blessing.

and so i vow to myself that when i'm an older mom, and my kids have grown... i will remember what it's like to be in charge of tiny, independent, excitable, full of energy little ones.  i will think how i can help; maybe i can be the one to wipe up the spilled water.  maybe open a door, or let a mom of little ones have my place in line.  i will try to pay attention to see who might need some extra help, some encouragement, a bright spot in their day.  i will be patient with their children and treat them as blessings, not as annoyances.  and i will approach mamas in public--not to give them advice or to state my opinion--but to merely say "hang in there, mama; you're doing a good job."

because us mamas need to hear that more often.  it's the hardest job we'll ever have.