to all the mamas.

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being a mama is hard work.  period.

a couple of weeks ago there was an article that was making its way around facebook and other social media outlets about the unfair way society views stay at home moms.

let me just say: i totally agree.

i really like this particular blogger and his straight-shooting nature and sarcastic wit.  and let me say this again: i totally agree with the heart of this article.  however, some of the surrounding dialogue and points made by the author bugged me and these thoughts have been rolling around in my head for a few days now.  so now, my lovely readers, you're getting them.  you're welcome.  the author, in an effort to set the record straight that being a stay at home mom is a really, really hard job, in turn wrote with some unfairness towards working mamas.  he basically insinuated that working moms have it way easier, and that many jobs outside the home contain menial tasks and require very little labor.

ouch.  i wish he could come shadow me at my job someday.

the spirit in which this article was written just irked me. as a mama who stays at home part-time and works outside the home part-time, i pretty much live in both worlds.  i have a couple days off during the week and i am with my kids all summer, so i definitely get the staying at home gig.  maybe sometimes more than the working outside the home thing, since i'm with my kids more than i'm not.  but i also consider myself a working mom, even if it's just a couple days a week.  i get a taste of both roles, and fully know and experience the pros and cons of each.

because there are definitely things that make working at home harder, and things that making working outside harder.  it's not a competition--or it shouldn't be--being a mama is hard work.  period.

it saddens me to hear the competition that takes place between working moms and stay at home moms.  i hear people in both camps exchange ignorant words; how many working mamas do you think work outside the home because they really prefer that their "babies be raised by someone other than them"?  and how many stay at home mamas do you know stay at home so they can sit on the couch in their sweatpants all day?  hopefully not many!  i always try to hide a laugh when it's a day i'm home with my girls and someone asks me "oh, did you watch the today show this morning?"  because, you know, that's what stay at home moms do.  and yesterday i was a school counselor instead of stay at home mama, and i fell asleep on the couch before nine o'clock.  in the middle of the red sox game.  that's how tired i was.

 instead of trying to compete with each other over which job is harder, why not try to develop a mutual respect and understanding for each other's unique needs and the demands placed on us by our respective roles?

work at home, work outside the home... it's all still work.  and it's hard.  because at the end of the day, we're all mamas.  we're all taking care of little lives that we continually put before our own.  everything we do (or just about everything we do) is motivated out of love for them, and what's best for them either now or in the future.

after all, when the sun goes down, all is quiet and we're tucking in our little ones at the end of a long day... whether we've worked hard caring for munchkins, carpooling to and from school, and cleaning up constant messes... or we've labored over business deals, taught fifteen wiggle-bodied kindergarten students or had hectic commutes... we're all still mamas.

and if we aren't for each other, than who will be?